five states. 48 hours.

I feel like that life I just lived was my life for about a week. but at the same time it feels like it never happened at all. seriously, who was that person working hard on an airplane. I used to say... who can work on airplanes? for me it is all about entertaining myself. turns out I should take a trip every time something is due on Monday. I am contained in this tiny little seat and I have nothing to get up for. no food to fetch. I definitely do not want to visit the restroom. and there's no internet. just me. the work. and the iPod. oh, and did I mention the pressure? that's pretty important too. even if I woke up after sleeping for less than two hours and I woke at 1:15am my time and even though I was much more comfortable this time and could have slept the plane was going to land in four hours. I only had four hours and i was fucking amazing. not amazing enough, unfortunately because the amount of work I was trying to complete in that very short time just wasn't possible. So. I am sure I failed and I will have to go through this hell all over again but I just want you to know that during those four hours on the airplane. fucking amazing. and that's what I'll take with me this time.

obviously, we did not hang out and I was not expecting to hang out. I just wanted to be there and wanted to share that day even from afar. they are very special people and when she wanted to know why... I said... well... he is funny and he really likes lily. but obviously that's not all he is. they are both amazing people full of love. I laughed at all of their jokes because I got that. but that damn crossword puzzle? I knew nothing. I still think 32 across was melissaalbers even though she said it was some girl who sings country music.

I really would love to live by them but I still do not know if I could live there and if I did live there we probably would not see each other as much as I think we would see each other and I would be sad if it turned into something that we keep meaning to do. not to mention I am not sure she could handle both of us in the same state. our procrastinating ways nearly gave her a heart attack and that was all within 24 hours. they definitely get the most accommodating hosts of the year award. the snacks were prefect, the bed was amazing, there was soymilk and a brand new bathroom and when I did not have a wallet they bought the coffee and...

...this is just the kind of blog that i hate. when I say too much but not enough. maybe I'll try again later.

well, I'm trying again later but not really because I am just making things worse and I am not going back to edit. He asked if I was over the stress of the weekend and I said even though it was stress, it was just the stress you have because you are supposed to have it. more than anything it was just fun. who cares that I did not know the status of my wallet and my phone and my work and my camera for a full 24 hours and who cares that my project was due and who cares that I had to stay another day and plan the lessons for the substitute from the other side of the country and who cares that someone else had my debit card because they were there for me when I had nothing and I still got to go to the wedding and it is just a stupid project and that was one more day I did not have to see the children and maybe that twenty five dollars was well spent and made someone else's day and I would have just spent it on five lattes.